January: At the start of this year I had just sold my house and moved home with my parents. A lot of people would view this as a negative, but sometimes you need to take a step back and launch forward. I decided to sell my house to pay off my student loans and give me the freedom to move where I wanted to once I graduated. At the start I really enjoyed living at home. The stresses of caring for an entire home where gone. I was heading into my last semester of nursing school. Knowing that major stress was gone was a huge relief.
Entering my last semester of nursing school, I was getting prepared for entering the work force. I had worked most of winter break on my resume and cover letter. Learning that I was terrible at selling myself, especially my accomplishments leading up to my impending graduation. I started applying as soon as I could, knowing certain residency programs had early deadlines.
I remember my first interview call. I was so excited. I wasn’t sure if I was going to have to travel. My mother, whom I love dearly, not so gently reminded me that I wouldn’t be able to travel for every interview. I was lucky enough to get a video interview with ease. I got an email the weekend we were driving to visit my aunt and uncle in Kentucky. As I thought and prayed I knew although the offer was good, it wasn’t where I wanted to be. The position wasn’t what I wanted. I was starting to realize my list of hospitals was incredibly wrong. I needed to shift my gears. No longer aimlessly applying but if I got the job, I would actually take it.
This revelation started to take place as I was in Kentucky, in March. You can only guess what that means. COVID. I remember sitting in their apartment and watching Trump on the news discussing what was going on. By the time I got home, my spring break from school had been extended. Only to go online for the rest of the semester. I wasn’t sure how my final capstone project was going to go, or if it was going to happen at all.
Durning this time of uncertainty I had some more interviews. All outside of New York. I knew I would be able to get a job in New York and somehow apply to jobs in New York felt like giving up. But the time was coming where I had to choose which state I was going to apply for licensing in. I was waiting hoping for a light to guide. I had two jobs in Idaho with potential. I had accepted one, and went on and applied for licensing.
I remember the day I got the call, my job offer had been rescinded. I had just applied for Idaho Licensing maybe a week prior. I was sitting on the stairs of my parents house. The man on the phone was nice, but kept beating around the bush. They had rescieded the offer and weren’t sure when they were going to be hiring again. I walked to the kitchen told my mom. She searched my face, I responded with I had just applied for an Idaho Iicense and started sobbing. I had no clue what I was going to do. If I applied in New York, I would have to apply for a New York License after I got my Idaho License.
Hospitals started postponing new grad hiring or cutting the amount of new graduates they were going to hire. It suddenly became a very dim picture. I wrestled with God. Eventually after many rabbit holes and lessons learned. I accepted a job at Kootenai. The place at the start God told me where I would end up. In a small town in Idaho I literally had never heard of.
I started preparing for my NCLEX. Two weeks off studying, volatile emotions, and lots of tears. I took the test and ended up passing in the minimum number of questions. As soon as I passed, I started to prepare to move across the county. I finally quit my lab technician job. I was able to work part time through the quarantine. Which I was grateful to be able to get out of the house. I love my family, but I was not used to living with that many people. It was hard towards the end. But I fully recognized that this was the most time I was going to be able to spend with them before I moved. I cherished that time.
As I prepared to move, I was full of mixed emotions. I had never been to Coeur d’Alene. I had no clue what I was in for. I knew it would be difficult. But it was the biggest leap of faith. I shipped my car and picked it up in Spokane. As I drove into Coeur d’Alene and passed the Welcome to Idaho I couldn’t help but cry. I have wanted to live out west as long as I could remember. It was beautiful. I wasn’t disappointed.
I was met with challenges from the start. Some expected and some unexpected Going from relationships that had been 5,6 or 7 years in the making to starting over from scratch. Finding a new home church proved to be difficult. My parents had to cancel their trip because I had COVID. I canceled my trip to come home in December due to the restrictions set in place. My first thanksgiving without my family and my first Christmas without my family.
But in those challenges, I floushised. I found a home church that has allowed me to make friends, and become a mentor. I have some pretty cool friends here. I have a job that although difficult some days, is rewarding and I love. I live in a beautiful town, with plenty of amazing views and day trips. I have learned how to be alone better. I have learned that my life line is Christ, in everything. I have learned that relationships have seasons and that’s okay. It’s okay to outgrow situations, towns and people. It’s okay to run after growth.
I am excited for what 2021 holds. I know for a lot of people 2020 was terrible. But I can’t lie, I loved 2020. A lot of good happened, although there were challenges I wouldn’t have changed it for anything. I know I still have so much to learn. Let’s get this show on the road!